"I move onward, the only direction. Can't be scared to fail in the search of perfection."

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Hi + Hello

Happy Week 28! I couldn’t help myself. I had to pick a JAŸ-Z lyric because he has taken over the city these last few weekends. If it wasn’t Knicks gear or a soccer — oops, fútbol — jersey, that JAŸ-Z30 was front and center. While I was not in attendance at any of the concerts, I saw enough clips to feel a wee bit of the past-tense version of FOMO. (Apparently that term is KIMO or “knowing I missed out”… although, quiet as its kept, apparently it was not all good in the hood on all three nights…). But I will sit in that decision, knowing it was right for me at the time that I made it. And sometimes, we just have to tell ourselves that 🫠

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✍🏾 #RandomSessionNotes

1. Time away doesn't change your day-to-day circumstances. Changing how you spend your time in the present does.

2. Regarding goals, the "what" may stay the same, but the "how” and “when" might change.

3. There is no substitute for direct communication.

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🔧 Tips, Tricks, and Tidbits

Positive psychology is more than thinking happy thoughts. It began with a shift in focus. Instead of only studying what was wrong or "broken" in people, researchers started asking a different question: what helps people thrive?

Ironically, many of the answers weren't what we'd typically call positive. Resilience is born from adversity. Courage requires fear. Wisdom often comes from mistakes. Gratitude is frequently shaped by loss. Positive psychology reminds us that the good, the bad, and the ugly aren't separate chapters of our lives, but experiences that work together to shape who we become.

We may naturally overlook is what we gained from painful experiences. Rarely do we want to sit in that discomfort. We remember what hurt to avoid it again, but often miss what we built in the process of getting through: the strength, the perspective, the boundaries, the compassion, the confidence. Don't throw the baby out with the bathwater. You're proof that you've made it through things you once weren't sure you could. So don't just remember what happened to you. Extract what it took for you to make it through, and sit on that.

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😏 Unrelated Musings

I read an article in the NY Times called “I’m a Therapist. Not Everyone Should Be in Therapy.” It’s by Harvey Lieberman, a psychologist. I agree with a lot of what he said. While I’m grateful and appreciative that access to therapy has widened immensely (and frankly, has allowed me to pursue my dream much earlier than planned), the pendulum may have swung a little too far to the opposite side. Therapy isn’t, and shouldn’t be, a catch-all for each discomfort and unpleasantry we experience in life. Life is full of those, every single day. Therapy, in and of itself, doesn’t change the unfortunate circumstances that we may find ourselves in, individually, collectively, or systemically (if only the economy, or the government, or the stock market would go to therapy and get itself together). Therapy definitely doesn’t do very much if we’re not willing to do very much. And lastly, therapy doesn’t replace one of the most healing things we have access to: each other. I’m glad we’ve expanded access. We should use it if and when we need to, and also recognize when we’ve grown to a place where it might have a different role in our life. And, for all of us, in therapy or not, I would prescribe consistent and positive connections, healthy communication, and safe communities and systems. (A girl can dream 😇)

My favorite possible self writes another blog post in approximately one week! My mantra says I follow through, so I must! See you there!

xo janelle

ps. If you’re in the market for free custom workouts, I make them and update them every Monday here. For unrelated personal chaotic workout videos, random photos of my life and happenings, and more, come hang on IG =)

| Microdosing Wellness 28mg 💊